A female former subordinate of mine has just asked my opinion on how can she tell if her boyfriend is only after sex or is sincerely for her love and affection
I gave her a few tell-tale signs. And these apply not only for single ladies but also for married, two-timing women.
First and FOREMOST, when the guy starts asking for sex MORE OFTEN than simply spending sweet private moments with you, or worse if he sets sex as a pre-condition for anything you want, he just wants to FEAST on your bumpers and your ‘private garden’ for as long as he could.
Second, if he wants to record your sexual encounters on video every time and anywhere you do it. That means he doesn’t respect your privacy and dignity as a woman. What makes me say so? Consider this: If the guy really loves you, HE WOULDN’T DO ANYTHING that could possibly shame or humiliate you in the eyes of other people.
Don’t tell me you haven’t heard of porn stuff being circulated through mobile phones.
If you readily believed that he’s doing it only for his personal and private amusement, you’re nothing less than a SUCKER, much as I hate to say it. And what physical, rock-solid guarantee can he give you that nobody else will see the video except him?
Third, if your guy French-kisses you as if the world will end the next day even if you’ve only been apart for several hours, or worse, if he licks your sensitive areas or caresses your body IN PUBLIC, especially in broad daylight, and gives the flimsy excuse that there’s no problem because you’re in his car or in a secluded corner of the office.
Fourth, if he insists on sex or even some heavy petting even if you’re not feeling well or rushing to finish something for school or for the office.
Fifth, if he GETS MAD and raises hell whenever you reject his sexual advances or requests, and would not even listen to your reason as he slams the door or bangs the phone hard enough that you get an instant headache as you start hearing a ring tone in your ears.
If you ladies are in any of these situations, GET OUT if you still have some SANITY and self-respect left In you. Your guy DOESN’T LOVE YOU! You’re not his lover, you’re his SEX TOY!
Sex is a part of Love, but Love is not Sex.
Keep this in mind, girls: If your partner REALLY LOVES YOU, it’s what you like, what you want or what you needs that comes first (that is assuming it’s not illegal or immoral or detrimental to anybody). Not what he wants. 30
In my experiences and observations with other people, as well as in my readings, and conversations with so many friends (male and female on their experiences too), I believe in every word you said here, Boyet! I hope, especially the ladies, will read and take this to their heart and mind. Maybe in addition is the guy's insistence on the use of contraceptives every time he wants to do it. And if contraceptives failed, abortion will surely follows (a great indication that what a guy wants is only a satisfaction of his lust, but just mouthing love without truth. God bless us all!
ReplyDeleteSex is good but do it only within the boundary of marriage. Outside of it is improper and untimely.
ReplyDeletesex is a sacred thing. God's purpose is for us to multiply. Sex is not for sale.
ReplyDeleteSex has always been for sale. Sex is the oldest trade actually ... but that is not the message of the blog :)
ReplyDeleteIf a man and a woman love each other, all their sexual encounters will be treated a way of showing love for each other. The more a man couldn’t keep his hands off her and the more he shows an outward display of his affection, the more a woman feels loved and wanted. But they should be done only at the right time (not when you’re unwell or busy) and the right place. Sexual advances are also welcome within reasons.
ReplyDeleteBoyet I totally agree with you with regards to videoing sexual encounters when you say that it is a sign of disrespect for the woman’s privacy and dignity. I wouldn’t like that done to me too.
When you say that It’s what you like, what you want or what you need that comes first if the man loves a woman. This is true but the same principle goes with the man too.
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ReplyDeleteBoyet,
ReplyDeleteHow about if it is the woman who is always craving for sex? Does it mean that she does not love the man other than sex?
He he he...